Letter to Zelda
by Triplequalm
Summary: This is just something I did for practice. The idea popped into my head and I just had to write it down. As the title implies, this is a letter to Queen (yes, she's queen at this point) Zelda, asking to improve her military. Sadly, if this advice were ever taken, we may not have another Zelda game... Rated K for descriptions of the workings of a cannon. First fanfic. Oneshot.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Link, Zelda, The Legend of Zelda series, or any trademarks, characters, or elements associated with the series. The following is just something I wrote for practice.**

Dear Queen Zelda,

I am writing to you about a matter that is of great importance to our kingdom's survival in coming years. I'm sure you know this as well as anyone, but over the centuries, Ganondorf Dragmire has repeatedly occupied our kingdom with the intent to turn the land into a living hell. He wants nothing more than to see us all dead or enslaved. The only reason we have even been born is because your hero, Link, or rather his predecessors, single-handedly defeated Ganondorf and his army on multiple occasions. But what if Ganondorf invades again? Link will surely rise once more and defeat him, correct? Maybe so, but what if the new Link fails? Will we just lie down and let that bastard Ganon murder us all? Or will we stand up for ourselves and use the resources of our kingdom to send that villain back to whence he came? I propose the latter.

Now, from here, there are three things we can do to improve our army. The first is simply to increase arms production, step up recruiting, and drastically improve our training routine. I believe we can take care of that matter rather easily. The next, you should know about. While there may be three spells exclusively granted to you via the Triforce of Wisdom, you also learned numerous spells in your youth before you received said Triforce from your mother. At this point, you are the only magician in the kingdom who can use her abilities for more than just simple tricks. I propose we start a school for magic users to fix this problem. Now, seeing as you have the rather weighty task of running the country, you only need to train a few people in the art of magic. Once they are good enough, we open the school and hopeful recruits start pouring in. With your expertise, I believe we can make a corps of magicians, about 100 strong, in about four years from the school's opening. Imagine how those Moblins would react when their heads spontaneously combust! The third is by adopting a certain invention for our army and improving upon it. You see, a young genius by the name of Milo has created a device he describes as a "Lead Launcher." It utilizes a powder consisting of three natural substances, which, when combined, burst into flames at the slightest spark. It's little more than a large, elaborate tube on wheels, sealed at one end. You stuff a wad of this powder into the tube, and shove a large iron or lead ball down after it. There's a small string sticking out of the back of it, which leads into the tube itself, in contact with the powder. You light this string, and the flame travels down it, into the tube, and lights the powder. Now, the powder ordinarily makes flames when ignited, but if you shove this ball on top of it, in such a tight and confined space, the sheer amount of gas released propels the ball out of the tube at such a speed that the Hylian eye cannot perceive it. Not only would a direct hit from this "Lead Launcher" probably kill even some of Ganon's monsters on impact, but it could bust down the walls of most stone fortifications with a single shot. This does not mean that the Lead Launcher has no drawbacks. For one thing, in its current state, it takes around a minute to reload—hardly efficient. Also, if the powder is not handled properly, or the tube/projectile is manufactured wrong, then the device could explode, killing everyone around it. With some experimentation, however, I believe we can make this into a formidable part of our army. The blueprint is enclosed. Please send me your thoughts on this three-point plan.

Sincerely,

Falon, Captain of the Guard

**Author's Note:** I am open to constructive criticism and feedback. Please be respectful in the reviews. Also, if you don't like the Captain of the Guard's name, it was the first thing that popped into my head.


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